Tag Archives: relationship

Nothing Like I’ve had Before

He was nothing like I’ve had before.

Sure he was smooth.

Sure he was soft.

But he has hard and rough too.

 

He had a way of making you relax and enjoy the moment before you could realise how high he had taken you.

He had a way of making you want to just see him.

To see his eyes, dark and mysterious.

To see his face, serious and handsome.

To see his smile or hear his laugh and watch as his eyes disappeared and you could get a glimpse of his well-protected soul.

 

He tried so hard to seem tough.

He tried so hard to prove he was rough.

But time would show the things it cannot hide.

Like his growing need to see me.

Like his habit of burying his face in my neck and just breathing me in.

Like his insistence on not parting without a kiss.

 

His heart began to show and I pushed him away.

Now another wall has been erected around his heart.

All because of my fear of what it might have been.

It didn’t fit any descriptor.

It was completely unfamiliar.

 

He was nothing like I’ve had before.

 

 

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Chocolate Therapy Session 1

“He was just a stranger with a drink. Till he spoke. Then he became an experience I wanted to have. Once, perhaps. That should be enough” she said.

“Hmm. What exactly did he say? What did you two talk about?” asked the therapist.

“It’s not so much what he said but how he said it” she tried to explain. “He spoke with such confidence. He commanded attention without raising his voice. That sexy voice of his. It’s like chocolate- he’s like chocolate. You just want to lick it.”

“So his voice is what attracted you to him then?” a valid question.

“That paired with his look. He had these eyes…I don’t want to say dreamy but they make you want to know what’s behind them. And when he smiles and they get even smaller, gosh it’s just an overall gorgeous look.” Smiling and biting her lips at the same time, the recliner transported her down memory lane.

“I knew he was taken but I just wanted to have some fun. After all, I’ve never seen a tree I wanted to climb and didn’t. I told him I wanted him and he was ok with the suggestion. So we had sex.”

“His voice drew you into bed with him? Is that what I am getting?”

“Ummm. I don’t know. Maybe because physically he’s different from what I normally go for but his different it good. He felt different and newness was sweet. He was sweet. I liked the feel and taste of his skin. I liked the fact that I didn’t have to say anything or ask anything. I like the fact that he just did it. I liked the fact that he didn’t ask me to do anything I didn’t want to simply because he wanted me to. I liked the fact that he made it easy to feel right. I looked past some things I shouldn’t have because after all I just wanted one thing and then I’d be gone but…I liked the sex more than I thought I would. I liked the feel of his body more than I thought I would and it happened again. I broke my rules with this man and when I said I’d had enough I let his voice and eyes pull me back. And ooooh, he’s so refreshing in bed.”

“Though I don’t condone messing around with men already involved in a relationship, there is nothing wrong with an occasional tussle between two consenting adults. This is probably what you needed, Ava” said the therapist, still trying to figure out the purpose of the session.

“You don’t get it do you? I developed feelings for this man. I wanted one like him for myself because I knew I couldn’t have him. I really liked him till I saw the family portrait in his wallet. He’s your husband, Carmen.”

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Warning: Part 2 is for mature readers only. Contact me for password

Why Can’t Men Do Right?

Hold on!

Don’t come at me just yet, defending your men and what-not. Just hear me out real quick.

 

I was just recently catching myself up on Scandal’s Season 5 episodes and episode 15 – Pencil’s Down, had me a certain kind of way. Now Shonda has always had a way of taking viewers on a roller coaster ride of emotions for the 42 minute duration of her TV shows. I just didn’t expect this ‘wham-bam-thank-you-mam’ quick thing after that period of calm.

I am making reference to the short-lived but sweet little romance that was forcibly planted between Attorney General. David Rosen and Vice President, Susan Ross. In a matter of few minutes I found out they were in love then their ‘thing’ ended the same time.

I felt all the feels in the world when Susan asked David if he was cheating and after denying it and saying how he wanted only her, she leapt into his arms before he could complete his statement. I felt everything she was feeling. The reassurance, the comfort, the safety.

When David stood up to Elizabeth and told her that it (the “nasty” [David’s word, not mine.] affair) had to end. I felt proud of him. I felt that he finally realized the value of what he had in Susan. He should have stood up to Elizabeth simply because she emasculates him.

When Susan got a bit of advice from the President then breaks it off with David, her words and just the manner in which she did it conveyed a familiar feeling to me. Her heart was broken, she felt deceived and had already retreated to a place where she was before – focus on self and trust no man. Unfortunately, that meant taking up an old, bad habit.

Now to the meat. When David said “For what its worth, its over. I didn’t want to lie anymore. I didn’t want to cheat anymore. The thought of losing you, it made me sick to my stomach, so I ended it. I’m yours Susan. I love you. I love only you.” Susan’s look was LIFE to me! Because all I was thinking was what she must have been thinking. Having been in her position (not Vice President, lol) before, I know what that must feel like. I don’t want a man that realizes that I am worth being faithful to after he has already had his fill with cheating. I want a man who sees me as that valuable to protect what I had entrusted to him; my heart. Why would I settle for a man that cannot realise that?

Majority of the relationships I have been ended because of that same thing. Now I have decided that it is way better and my time is better spent valuing myself and doing what I want than to settle for a man who will do me dirtier than I could do myself. I just want to know why is it that men cannot value women till they are at risk of losing them? Why can’t men be satisfied with what they have? or at least content! Or better yet, why do men even bother to take the hearts of women they have no serious intentions for?

When a woman is betrayed in that kind of way, scars are left behind. Those scars will plague her and her next relationship. It hinders her being open to men because she doesn’t want that to happen again and she doesn’t know who will do that to her again.

What do you think ladies and gents?

 

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Certainly, Your love.

My love,

What a journey it has been. The ups, the downs, the uncertainties – and here we are today able to celebrate the little accomplishments.

I know at this very moment you may identify with the feeling of exhaustion more than any other and yes, there will be time to rest. I will cater to you. It is my duty and you are my priority.

I just wanted you to know that I see the hours of work you put in. I see the attention you give. I know about all the sleepless nights. I see your overworking mind, never at rest. I see you making moves. I see the sacrifices you make and understand the skill you demonstrate in being mindful of your queen all while building a dream.

I want you to know that I see all that and I appreciate it and even more so I appreciate you. I appreciate you being a man in my life but not just any man –the real, amazing man you are. I appreciate how you make time for me and my problems. I appreciate how you listen to my ramblings. I appreciate how you drop everything to make sure I am alright. I appreciate how you ensure that my mind is at ease before bed each night. I appreciate how you relieve my stress. I appreciate how you make me feel safe and secure. I appreciate how you free my mind from worry by being true to yourself, to me and to us.

None of that has gone unnoticed and I want you to know that. I’m going to show you that.

I hope you like the contents.

Get dressed. We’re going out.

Then afterwards, I’m going to savour undressing you…..

Certainly,

Your love.

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